He pressed ahead looking through the haze without knowing if he would ever get to his destination. He knew what was behind him, and he didn’t want to go back, but it felt impossible to reach the goal. He didn’t even know how to get there.
Isn’t that funny; he was trying to get somewhere, and he didn’t know the way. He thought about all the laughs and rumours; the betrayals and subterfuges; the snakes in the grasses. Still, these thoughts were not enough to deter him from taking the next step.
He felt like giving up many times. The more he walked forward, the more enemies arose. He wanted to hear the voice of the A name used for Yahuah. saying, turn left or turn right, but it never came. Yet, he could see clearer every day, and the revelations rocked him to the core.
Revelation after revelation after revelation. He couldn’t take it. It was too much. His brain was bombarded from all angles, and the light shining in his eyes was revealing things that he did not expect. He saw too much, and he had to take a break. The light waited…
He raised his head again and instantly he was shown more. He put his hand to his head as if it hurt; it did hurt, but with each revelation came strength. There was a fire, burning him, changing him, making him stronger and wiser. He prayed; he got answers. There were prayers he wished he hadn’t prayed when he was in the midst of the fire, but the bridges had to be crossed.
He felt faint, but something kept him upright. It always happened this way. As soon as he was willing to step forward, the light came; as soon as he felt faint, the hand came; when he stumbled, the shame came.
He kept walking and saw many diversions along the way. They beckoned to him, offering wisdom and guidance. He stopped and turned down a path; the fire came and scorched his whole being till he turned around. He when back to the main road to ease the pain. He wondered again if he would have to walk this journey alone. A voice whispered — yes.
He stopped further down the path despite the whisper and despite the previous scorching. The side road was beautiful. He asked himself. How could this not be the right thing to do? He took a step off the path and screamed. The pain was excruciating. He didn’t understand how this was wrong, but he remembered he had asked for his steps to be guided.
He stepped back onto the path.
If this hand that guided him was real, he was not messing around. Sweat poured down his whole body, but he couldn’t stop — he wouldn’t stop. The more he walked, the more he understood what was left behind. He saw with vivid clarity the pits at the end of the paths he had left behind. There were more to come he knew, hidden in the haze that lay ahead.
At this point he was crazy.
He felt those eyes on him again. The enemy he fought a while back. He was just as exhausted as before, but in a split second the blade flashed across his eyes. It would appear he was caught off guard — this was not the case. With the flick of a wrist, the enemy was down — and out.
He pressed on, but far ahead through the haze, he could see bigger shadows lurking off the path. If by their size you could tell their power, then they made the adversary he just cut down look like child’s play.
He gritted his teeth and kept walking forward. He knew there was no way he could win — on his own.
He was going forward or going to the grave, but there was no way he was going back.
This road was only for the fearless.